One in Eight Hearts Break for a Child
That’s 7.3 million American people who have difficulties conceiving. A couple is classified as experiencing infertility if they have been unable to become pregnant after over a year of unprotected sex (if they are under 35) or 6 months of unprotected sex (if they are over 35). That means that anyone can struggle to have a biological family. No matter what race, religion, sexuality or economic status you are, infertility doesn’t discriminate.
In my work as a perinatal mental health counselor in California, individuals and couples generally come to me at two different points of their infertility journey. It’s often at the time when they have realized their “dreams” of creating a family aren’t as easy as they thought it would be or after they’ve started their infertility treatments.
Going through infertility can be a very isolating and lonely experience for couples. A big part of the isolation and loneliness is due to the stigma that is heavily present in the difficulty of conceiving naturally. Many people will experience feelings of shame or inadequacy which make it difficult for them to reach out to other people for help.
In honor of Infertility Awareness Week, I want to start a conversation about infertility. To let the 7.3 million Americans struggling with infertility know that they are not alone.
Why Do Couples Suffer From Infertility?
Personalizedcause.com put together a comprehensive list of the causes of infertility separated by sexes. I will share that with you below.
Things that can cause infertility in men include:
The sperm itself: under-production of sperm, or limited function of the sperm.
The delivery of the sperm: sometimes vessels can be blocked or there can be structural abnormalities.
The environment: overexposure to things like saunas, or Jacuzzi’s, can affect the body’s ability to produce sperm.
Overuse of harmful substances: overconsumption of things such as alcohol, cigarettes (any consumption of cigarettes is too much), marijuana, and metabolic steroids can seriously influence your ability to produce normal amounts of sperm as well as normal quality sperm.
Other health problems, and respective treatments: one major example of this is cancer and the resulting impairment of sperm production from chemotherapy or radiation.
Things that can cause infertility in women include:
Issues with ovulation: ovulation disorders and hormonal disorders can affect how eggs are released, such as polycystic ovarian syndrome, hyperprolactinemia, thyroid disorders.
Abnormalities of the uterus or cervix: this includes things like structural abnormalities of the cervix or uterus or shape of the uterus. It can also include polyps, benign tumors (meaning non-cancerous abnormal cell growths), or fibroids in the uterus.
Damaged or blocked fallopian tubes: there is something called salpingitis, which can cause inflammation of the fallopian tubes. Inflammation, when persistent and untreated, can result in damage over long periods of time. Salpingitis can be caused by P.I.D., aka pelvic inflammatory disease, which usually is the result of a sexually transmitted infection (STI), endometriosis, or adhesions.
Endometriosis: this disease occurs when the lining of the uterus, also known as the endometrium, starts to grow outside of the uterus. The migrating cell growth can cause issues in how the female reproductive organs function. It is most commonly diagnosed when women come in reporting abnormally painful, long, and heavy periods.
Early menopause, also referred to as primary ovarian insufficiency: this is when the ovaries begin to shut down earlier than in most women, and periods end before age 40. There isn’t a surefire cause of primary ovarian insufficiency, however, there are a few known factors that can raise the likelihood of early menopause. These factors include smoking, immune system diseases, radiation or chemotherapy, Fragile X syndrome, and some genetic conditions like Turner syndrome.
Scar tissue: adhesions, or scar tissue, can form from pelvic inflammatory disease, pelvic infections; any time surgery is performed in the area (especially after C-sections. Women who have already had children without experiencing infertility can still deal with it later.), or even from an appendicitis.
Other health problems, and respective treatments: again, this includes cancer and radiation therapy or chemotherapy. In women, both radiation and chemo can have severe implications on the reproductive system, especially the eggs. Of course, there are also a myriad of other diseases that can contribute to infertility that are not directly located in the reproductive organs, such as celiac disease, diabetes, and autoimmune diseases like lupus.
Shared causes can include:
Age. As women age, especially after a woman hits her mid 30’s, fertility swiftly declines. But, there is also a lot of evidence to suggest that men may also become less fertile after 40. Risk for the baby’s health also increases as the age of the parents’ increases. That is not to say it means the baby will definitely have health issues. It just means that certain issues become more likely, statistically.
Smoking. Smoking anything is bad for infertility. That means pot as well as cigarettes, cigars, or whatever else you may smoke. It makes miscarriage more likely, and makes fertility treatments less effective.
Alcohol. Technically speaking, alcohol is not recommended for women trying to conceive or women already pregnant. Alcohol consumption has been linked to increased risk of infertility and birth defects. What you may not have heard is that alcohol consumption in men can also increase infertility by lowering sperm count and sperm motility.
Being overweight and sedentary, or underweight, can contribute to infertility in both men and women.
Some Stats About Infertility
Here are some additional statistics related to infertility:
7.4 million women worldwide -- or 11.9% of all women -- have received some type of infertility services in their lifetime (2006-2010 National Survey of Family Growth, CDC).
1 in 8 couples (or 12% of married women) have trouble getting pregnant or sustaining a pregnancy (2006-2010 National Survey of Family Growth, CDC).
Approximately one-third of infertility is attributed to the female partner; one-third attributed to the male partner; and one-third is caused by a combination of problems in both partners or the source of the infertility is unexplained (www.asrm.org).
A couple between the ages of 29-33 with a normal functioning reproductive system has only a 20-25% chance of conceiving in any given month (National Women’s Health Resource Center).
After six months of trying, 60% of couples will conceive without medical assistance (Infertility As A Covered Benefit, William M. Mercer, 1997).
Approximately 44% of women with infertility have sought medical assistance. Of those who seek medical intervention, approximately 65% give birth. (Infertility As A Covered Benefit, William M. Mercer, 1997)
Infertility Support
For emotional and mental health support, reach out to a licensed therapist who can help you process your emotions during this difficult time. If you’re interested in learning more about perinatal mental health counseling with me, you can request a 15-minute free-of-charge phone consultation here.
Here are some great reading resources for mental health support during your infertility journey:
Stop the Self Blame Game: The Truth About Infertility and Stress
Beyond the Physical: Mental Health on Your Fertility Journey
5 Ways to Support a Friend Who’s Struggling With Infertility
Here are some great podcast episodes that offer support and encouragement for those on their infertility journey:
Episode 69: #NIAW: An Eggcellent Adventure to Parenthood: Matt and Doree
Episode 72: #NIAW: Different Paths Can Lead to the Same Place
Episode 1: Removing the Infertility Stigma Through National Infertility Awareness Week
Episode 35: Infertility Uncovered in Front of Cameras: Jamie Stelter
Episode 36: Infertility Uncovered When Limited Benefits Fall Short: Wajmah Yaqubi
Episode 37: Infertility Uncovered in the Workplace: Katherine Goldstein
Research has shown, time and time again, the healing benefit of storytelling. Both reading stories and telling your own story. Infertilityawareness.org has created an initiative for people to read about other real couples’ journey with infertility and also provides the platform for couples to write about their journey. Read the stories here.
As I close out this blog post, I want to remind you that you are not alone. You are worthy of a family. Get the support you need, today.